The Wedding Night

The Wedding Night

The Reluctant Warrior

by Kemal Tahir

Translated by Elif Mat 

Yahya Hodja presided over the ceremony. Neriman’s witness was Maksood and Jamil’s was Lieutenant Farouk.

When the guests congratulated the newlyweds and left; Neriman and Jamil gave a good night kiss to Salime and Enver who was pretending to sleep on the couch. They then went to their room upstairs.

Jamil’s bedroom had received a makeover. There were new curtains, new throws for the daybed and the twin bed was replaced with a large bed. Nazmi’s picture on the wall had been removed and in its place there was a picture of the Reshadiye warship that had been ordered from England and couldn’t be delivered because of the war.

Jamil locked the door and put his Fez on the bed. He approached Neriman who was standing in the middle of the room embarrassed. He held her hands. “Are you tired?”

“Yes and I am thinking of Enver, he is sad. He tries hard not to show his sadness.”

“He will get used to the idea quickly. Let’s sleep now. I am turning the light off.”

“No, wait!”

“No,” Jamil smiled. “That’s right I should have given you a wedding present first. If you hadn’t spoken then I would have given you another present just to make you speak.” Jamil teased her.

 “Mother made me promise that nothing will happen until you pray first.”

“That’s right, as if ...”

“No, you have to, please, otherwise it is bad luck. Then she became embarrassed again and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I am being so foolish.”

“Napoleon said that the foolish woman is better than the smart woman.” He kissed her neck. “Come on.”

“No, you have to pray first.”

“I’ll pray tomorrow morning.” He pulled her towards the bed. “Come on.”

Neriman pulled away and went to put the prayer rug on the floor. She said strongly, “I am waiting.”

Jamil responded, “Why is it that the woman doesn’t have to pray on the wedding night?”

“I asked about that. It is because women are too nervous that night”

“That’s true. Come on now.” He pulled Neriman towards the bed like he did before and let her fall on her back. Stay still. I will pray in the morning, I promise.”

“Wait a minute; be careful that you don’t rip the dress. Turn off the lamp. I am shy”

Neriman took off her clothes but she heard approaching footsteps and became scared. “Oh! It must be Enver...” They heard somebody standing in front of the door. It was Salime Hanim. “Neriman?”

“Yes, mother.”

Neriman tried to cover-up herself, Jamil approached the door and said, “Is there something to the matter?”

“We are in trouble. I told Enver not to tell anyone that you are here.”

“What happened?”

Enver told the Grocer Haji that you are here!”

“When?”

“When you came, he went to the shop to buy some cigarettes for us.”

“That’s all right.”

“No, it isn’t. That guy put his hat on and rushed out of the shop immediately. I was just reminding Enver that he shouldn’t mention that you came home and he told me that he had already mentioned this to Haji. What are we going to do?”

Neriman wrapped a sheet around herself and came to the door. She was shaking as if she was naked in the snow. Jamil tried to suppress his anger and calm the women. “It is not that big of a deal. Don’t worry. Probably he had just gone to the mosque for night prayers. He won’t go to call the Police on us in the middle of the night.”

“Don’t say that! I know how heartless he is. Where is Neriman?”

“I am here mother.” Neriman‘s teeth chattered. “If they raid the house, Jamil will fight. It’s over!” She was grabbing Jamil’s arm and shaking. “They will kill Jamil!”

“Don’t talk like that.”

“They will imprison him! They will exile him to Devil’s Island!” When she heard the neighborhood watchman’s stick hitting the stones, she stopped talking. She raised her head and listened. Her eyes grew large with fear. “They are coming. We are doomed!”

Salime whispered. “I don’t know.”

Neriman pleaded, “What are we going to do? They might search neighbours’ houses. They may circle the whole neighborhood.”

“Go to Yahya’s house then.”

Jamil hugged Neriman and kissed her. He whispered, “Get dressed quickly” He grabbed his Fez, touched his gun. “Get dressed, don’t panic!”

They knew that Salime’s fear was growing when they heard her voice.

“Now, tell me what are we going to do? You are both as quiet as the dead.” At that moment Enver called, “Grandmother”.  With that, Salime’s fear grew tenfold. “Quiet! Be quiet, Enver. What did I tell you? I told you not to tell anyone and you promised...”

Neriman started to cry.

Without thinking Jamil went to the cupboard and got his second charger and put it in his pocket. “Don’t be afraid. Stay calm. If he didn’t call the cops...I think he didn’t...He wouldn’t just go there without any proof. It’s just a kid who said that. He doesn’t know anything for sure. He won’t take any risks. He will be scared. He wouldn’t want to be responsible for a false alarm. Listen! I said listen. Don’t cry...”

Salime was still standing on the other side of the door whimpering, “What are we going to do?” Jamil became short tempered and said, “Are you all mad? Stop this.  It is not the end of the world.”Enver started crying downstairs. Salime went to talk to him.

Jamil was relieved that Salime left. He took Neriman to the daybed. “Please, don’t worry. They won’t kill me. You are crying for no good reason. Listen. I will go to hideout at the Bulgarian Cheesery. We will know in an hour if he in fact called the police or not. If they come to the door, don’t panic. Ask for the Muhtar and tell them that if the Muhtar is not present you won’t let them search the house. If they ask for me, tell them that you don’t know where I am and you think I am in Germany. Then come to this room and light the kerosene lamp immediately. Pull the curtains open and I will understand that they are at the house.” He checked the time. “If nobody comes within an hour that means there is no danger. We should wait until the morning, and then we will leave together in the early hours.”

“Where can we go? No, I can’t leave. I have to stay with Enver.”

“We will leave only for a couple of days.”

“We can’t leave them alone. Mother can’t be responsible for Enver on her own. I can’t come.”

“All right. We will think about this. Listen, don’t get scared, OK?” He kissed her cheek. “You are exhausted. All because of me....”

Neriman smiled bitterly. She felt even more vulnerable because she was naked.

Jamil felt sorry for her. He looked at her. He wanted to kiss her shoulder, but hesitated.

Salime was talking in her room to someone. Jamil picked up the raincoat that he borrowed from Halil Pasha. He heard Enver talking to his Grandma. Jamil was bitter, he was angry. He felt like hurting him. Then he was embarrassed at the thought and left the house quickly. He closed the door quietly. He rested his back on the door and listened to any noises in the street.

It was overcast. It was very dark. It was eerily silent. He thought about going to the wharf and getting a boat to cross the other side to Munir’s place. He didn’t want to leave his new bride on their wedding night just because of Salime’s worries. He was going downhill, carefully walking in the shadows. Then he stopped and looked back. There was no light coming from the wooden houses of the neighborhood. The only light was coming from Salime’s room.

He missed Neriman’s young naked body. That thought made him dizzy. He closed his eyes and stopped at the orchards at the bottom of the hill. He realised that it was not easy to knock on the Bulgarian Cheesery door. He was worried that all the dogs would start to bark suddenly. The noise would alert the security guards and the police officers as well as the likes of Haji. He went to Topagaci Street and sat by the fountain. He searched his pockets for cigarettes but realized that he had forgotten them at home. He was surprised at this. He never went anywhere without his tobacco and lighter since Macedonia. Even in the most dangerous situations he always had his cigarettes with him. He laughed and thought that his wedding night must be tougher than all the wars! He remembered the war stories. He wondered about how much money he had in his pocket. He remembered to take some money with him before leaving the house but couldn’t ask Neriman to get it when she was very confused already. He thought he must have two gold coins, seven paper Liras and some change. He was worried for a minute. Then he thought there was no need for more money that night. He had all these thoughts and more importantly he was craving tobacco. He felt even more depressed without his cigarettes.

Suddenly he saw light on in one of the houses at the top of the hill. That was Neriman signalling him. Their home was raided. He didn’t exhale and waited for any noises that he might hear from the house. He was looking straight ahead. He was waiting for the cries of women and children. He was imagining scenes of violence, the children’s heads under the boots, naked woman, invasion of privacy, and the clothes that were spread all over the house. He was seeing those images like on a movie screen. His anger was growing like the waves hitting an old ship. He was feeling the pressure building up in his veins. He got mad at the thought of someone taking away the sheets that Neriman wrapped around herself. As if someone was doing this to hurt his pride. He was just about to dash.

He was looking for the raincoat that he had dropped and at the same time thinking about what he could do with only two cartridges. He realized suddenly that a couple of months ago he was with the woman he loved in the safety of his house, comfortably looking through the binoculars, and now he is in the same situation as Rashid; cornered. He wondered how many people were raiding the house. “Five ten, maybe twenty.” He thought if Maksood, Nazmi and Patriot were here or a sergeant and four privates that he knew from the fronts, they   could have approached silently and ambushed them. They would have killed them all.

He remembered their successes at those kinds of ambushes and the pride and the joy they felt afterwards in Macedonia. He wondered, “Why people never thought about being ambushed. We were young, in our twenties. That’s why we were optimistic about everything.” He passed his hand over his face “If Nazmi was in my shoes he would have never left Neriman there, all by herself. He would go and fight with the enemy single-handedly and take her by the wrist and pull her out of there.”

Nazmi died young. Therefore, he had that immortality. That was a powerful thing. He thought about the meaning of immortality. He knew Nazmi quite well. He realised that he was still squatting; when he wanted to pick up the raincoat he squatted and he remained in that position. He wondered how long he stayed like that and thought that this immobility could be a result of the constant fatigue that he was feeling. He wondered what he would do in case he heard cries for help coming from the house. Would he go there? Yelling and firing gun shots? He thought that would be stupid. He was holding his breath and listening, every passing minute was hurting his pride as a man.

After a long wait he heard the voices. He didn’t move. It didn’t make him sadder. He felt like he was in a dream. They had come silently but left with so much noise. His chest was tight he was feeling a heavy weight on his chest and that didn’t go away when the intruders left. He thought about going back home but he didn’t have the heart to face Neriman. He was feeling guilty about leaving her alone in the face of the enemy.
 Jamil decided to go back to Dr. Munir’s home....