Dead Sea, Jordan

There was thunder and lightning until midnight and drizzle after that.

Jamil and Munir were sitting under the walnut tree against the wall. They had their rain coats draped over themselves and their rifles.

Hidden away from the road, their animals were some twenty feet behind them; breathing heavily and nervously moving their heads; there were heavy machine guns a hundred feet away that were firing into the darkness in intervals.

Earlier, six hundred men had come from Bilejik to Bursa; their initial numbers were higher but four hundred men deserted on the way. The troops rested a bit then they continued their way to the newly established Beshevler Front to join the units fighting against Anzavour. The Commanders at the Division Headquarters were hoping for a quiet night, however, they were disturbed by the news of deserters in the evening. This time the Battalion revolted, they even drew guns on their Officers. While they were approaching Bursa, about two kilometers from the city they saw the women coming down the road. The women were yelling, “Brothers, Where are you going? Are you going to fire on the Muslims? These Gavour Officers are making you revolt against the Caliph! You will be Gavour as well if you obey those orders!”

The Nationalists were twenty three men altogether, most of them Officers and Sergeants; they were guarding Bursa from a possible attack from the deserted soldiers who had gone in the Mudanya direction. They feared the deserted soldiers may return and plunder Bursa. The forces back at the headquarters were not more than that number either. The bridges and the neighbourhoods of Bursa were being guarded by the Defence Association members and the citizens.

Upon hearing the heavy machine guns rapid fire, Jamil laughed nervously. “I am laughing at how Farouk is using the machine gun; he opens fire every five minutes and fires five bullets precisely.”

Munir answered, “Don’t be surprised. We are the experts at this; firing into the darkness. You should be surprised at the others; they are six hundred men with rifles and they are afraid of us! They can’t gather up the courage to come here.”

“There is also a possibility that they might have joined Anzavour.”

“That’s right! Where do you suppose Anzavour is? Do we have any fresh news of him?”

“We don’t have any good information. All we hear is rumours; he is coming; he is approaching; he is preparing for a sudden attack; he is going to win; he is hanging the Officers as he is approaching; he has encircled Bursa already…and so on,” Jamil answered.

“The plunderers in Bursa are worrying more than us,” Munir observed. “They are anxious. Where do you suppose Ethem the Circassian is at this moment?”

“He is coming from the Salihli direction. We don’t know exactly where he is. Some say he was scared and backed away and some say he is fighting against Gavour Imam, who is supporting Anzavour. There are rumours that they are fighting a bitter fight.”

Jamil’s horse must have been getting angry because of the constant rain. The animal was breathing heavily and digging at the ground. Jamil yelled but the animal didn’t calm down so he jumped to his feet, got his rifle and went to see what was going on. He descended to the ditch of the road that was going in the Bursa direction. He hunched over and stopped every once in a while to listen to the noises coming from that direction.

He heard footsteps on the muddy road and whistled so that Shaban could recognise him, then he held his breath and listened. He couldn’t figure out how many people were coming so he went farther in the ditch and hid behind the blackberry bushes. He directed his rifle towards the road. “Who are you? Tell me the password!” Whoever was approaching didn’t answer. “Password! Or I will shoot you!”

“My friend, I don’t know the password; I am looking for Captain Jamil.”

Jamil couldn’t hear the last words well; Farouk was firing his gun. “Don’t come any nearer. Tell me who you are!”

“I am looking for Captain Jamil!”

“Wait over there! What is your name?”

“Nuri Gonen! Major Nuri Gonen!”

“Hello, Sir! What brings you here in the middle of the night?” Jamil asked. He was still hiding in the shade, just to be sure. “Is there something the matter?”

“I am coming over there, Jamil. Wait a minute. I am tired.” Major Nuri was walking in the middle of the muddy road with difficulty. He had his rifle across his shoulder like a new recruit and breathing heavily. “I was walking fast without meaning to,” he smiled like a child. “God I am tired.”

“Why did you come? Why did you come all alone? It is dangerous.”

“I thought I should come to see you right away.”

“Why hasn’t Shaban accompanied you?”

“I didn’t ask him to accompany me.”

“What happened?”

“Maybe it is not that important, but…”

“What?”

“I woke up and noticed that Osman wasn’t in his bed. I worried so I got up and got dressed.” Nuri explained.

“Did Osman leave as well? I think he must have left when he heard the news of the second Battalion breaking up.”

“You guessed right! He went away! What happened to the Battalion?”

“Nothing. So Osman left! Did he tell anyone where he was going?”

“Who knows? His horse was saddled at all times; he jumped on it and went away. He said to the Sergeant that he was going to gather the gang together and come back with them. Do you think he will be back?”

“He might come back…after the commotion is over.”

 “I don’t think so! I know Osman. He is no coward!”

As Jamil and Nuri were talking, they came near Dr. Munir; he put his rifle back under the blanket and asked, “Who is not a coward? Who are you talking about?”

“Osman the Butcher.”

“What happened to him?”

Jamil laughed nervously, “He was unable to sleep so he got up and asked for his horse…”

“You are kidding!”

“I am serious!”

“Did he say he was going to go ambush Anzavour?”

“Hmm…It must be something like that. He went to gather his gang.”

“I guessed correctly then. His gang was mixed; there were all kinds of people from Crete, Kavala, Kars and Erzurum! If he went to gather them from all those places he would come back in time, no doubt, before the action starts! So the Major came here to bring us the news? Did Osman ask you to come here, Sir?”

“No, Doctor. I wanted to come to be together with friends tonight; one more rifle will help in the dark!”

“God Bless you!” Dr. Munir’s voice was full of emotion, “You came here without a raincoat; in this weather! You came to stand guard, is that right?”

“I don’t get cold! I didn’t want to stay at the Headquarters; I don’t feel like sleeping either.” He heard the Mitrailleuse fire and stopped talking, and then he asked in a lower voice, “Are they exchanging fire?” He lowered his voice, but not because of fear. “Are they fighting, Jamil? Good…Show me a place, please.”

Dr. Munir opened the blanket and invited him to get shelter from the rain. “Here is a place for you, Major! Come, I am not a big man, there is room for both of us!”

“No, please, I meant a position to fire from!”

“It is all right. Come here and you can shoot from here, as well. This is a good spot for fighting.”

Nuri came under the shelter. He said, “I didn’t mean to disturb you. I was going to say something. Oh! I remember! Yes, I was saying I know Osman well; I don’t believe he is a coward. I don’t think he went because of fear!”

“You are right; maybe it is not fear; he is discouraged and probably didn’t know how to handle his nerves.  It is not fear; people are getting sick and tired of all this.” Munir said to Jamil, “You too, Jamil, you sighed and then you looked at my face to see my expression. You were wondering whether I heard your sigh or not. You looked, even though you can’t see me in this dark.”

“Come on! There is nothing like that”

“Yes, there is. I know you are angry. Right then I wanted to ask you something…”

“What?”

“Why are you here? What are you guarding in the middle of night in this rain? If I asked you what would your answer be? Would you say you were guarding your country? If I asked you this question out of blue what would you say?” Munir wondered.

“Of course, I would say that. Why did you ask?”

“You Officers, you speak straight, you don’t lie. I don’t mean the entire Officers’ Corps; some of you are into the tricks. Some of the Officers are worse than the irregulars. When people are ignorant they try to fake courage. Osman the Butcher is like that but it is our fault, regardless. It is the fault of the trustworthy Officers.”

“Why?”

“We let them do all the tricks…Should we smoke?”

“Sure.”

“What if the light will be visible?”

“Don’t worry.”

Just as Jamil was taking the matches out he heard the machine gun; each bullet pierced through the darkness with a red, bright light. Major Nuri cocked his head, “Are they fighting?”

“No, Major! As the Doctor says, Lieutenant Farouk is firing into the darkness.”

Nuri didn’t get the joke. He said, “That’s heavy machine gun fire. It is a good gun.  It would be better in your hands than your opponents.” Major Nuri remembered his friend Gor, “We used to call Gor ‘heavy machine gun’. Do you remember him?” Jamil was going to say ‘no’ but Nuri continued, “You should know him. I was at Division Headquarters of Gor in Palestine. 4^th Army, 3^rd Army Corps, 1^st Infantry Division; he was like a robot himself but he was a good man. If you didn’t know his personality traits you would think that the man didn’t think, but he had a special way of thinking… Jamil, do you know the ‘Sea of Lot’?

“Yes, Major, I know.”

“It is four hundred meters below sea level; you know that for sure, don’t you?”

“Yes, I know.”

“Yes, my friend; it is four hundred meters below sea level. I used to think some nights; I wonder how it is even possible? I said, ‘This sand that we are lying on is so loose our elbows are digging into it yet it is holding the vast Mediterranean Sea. How come the Mediterranean Sea is not swallowing this sand up and not filling up this hole? The French call Sea of Lot ‘La Mer Morte’; it is the same in Turkish, ‘Oludeniz’”

Major Nuri thought about this for a while, and then he stretched his leg. His wound was still wrapped with bandages. He continued, “The British attacked us twice; they were trying to distract us.  I thought these were attacks to achieve the final victory, but they weren’t. I thought they were going to encircle us by going through Eriha Bridge and Salt Amman Headquarters…  They attacked Gaza twice with all their might and wanted to achieve results from the right side earlier. That’s why I thought they wouldn’t come to the same point again. Some Army Generals warned the Group Commanders, but to no avail. General Liman von Sanders didn’t take this seriously. Well, even if he took that seriously he couldn’t have done much anyway because there were only the 24th Infantry Division and 3^rd Cavalry Division behind for backup. We had a total force of twenty eight thousand men including the 7th and the 8th Armies, as well as our own 4th Army.  The Gerek Mountains were on our left and Harvan was behind us. We were separated from the7^th and the 8^th Armies by the Jordan River. We were 60 kilometers from the sea and that 60 kilometer long area was guarded by three Armies, in fact, as strong as 3 Divisions. When I say guard, you know what I mean. As a matter of fact, the enemy crushed the 22^nd Army Corps at the first strike; their Cavalry unit was right behind us. They were almost going to take the Armies Group Commander in Nasira prisoner. Because of that, the Palestinian Front was without a leader for a couple of days. While the 7^th and the 8^th Armies were retreating towards the Jordan River, we went to the mountains and retreated towards Dar. ”

Staff Major Nuri Bey waited until the machine gun stopped its rattling. He looked into the darkness. He was talking as if he was lecturing Officers at the War Academy. It was as if the war in question was Hannibal’s Battles, not his own.

Liman von Sanders

Jamil tried to guess what Nuri was looking at, he looked at in the same direction, but there was only darkness. Nuri continued, “What was I saying? Oh! Yes, retrieval; to be frank I never had difficulty in the wars until September of 1918!” He drew from his cigarette. “It wasn’t like I was shying away from the hardship. I didn’t think of making others shoulder the difficulties. My friends know me, I am no coward. I am afraid of dying like everyone, however, when facing danger I don’t think of dying.” He smiled, “I get scared after I throw myself in the line of danger.”

Jamil saw a lot of men in the army like Major Nuri; they are the ones that picked the wrong profession. They weren’t incapable; you didn’t feel sorry for them; you didn’t feel you needed to protect them in the dangerous places. Those types of men live all by themselves all alone in the army. They are tough; they don’t complain about the fatigue or poverty; they don’t even think of themselves as suffering from anything. They don’t get shell shock. They live in their own world. If they die they need a couple of minutes to live to be able to understand that they are dead!”

Jamil asked, “So you started to retreat…”

Jamil was curious what Nuri felt as they were retreating in Palestine. Nuri continued, “So we started to retreate. Our front wasn’t broken so we felt confident. We didn’t feel guilty. When I say we, you know no one in the 4^th Army felt guilty. Do you know Jamal who is from Mersin?”

“Yes, I know him.”

“I don’t know how he was able to get himself promoted to the rank of Army Commander. He didn’t seem ambitious. Maybe he is but he doesn’t let it show. Why did I tell you this? Maybe I wanted to tell someone for a long time. It doesn’t matter. I don’t know for sure. We were retreating. The enemy wasn’t pressuring us. We were going back in an orderly fashion. The troops were acting like they were coming back from training. The Commander was giving the orders in time and men were obeying in time; we all felt confident. We thought even if we were retreating we would stop the enemy somewhere that was for sure. I don’t know why we felt that confident, probably because we were out of the Dead Sea region. We were climbing up to higher ground. Yes. We were going towards the left towards the mountains. The mountains looked dark blue from a distance. It can be as hot as 60 to 70 degrees around the Jordan River and the Dead Sea shores. After all that heat going to the mountains made me think of the cool uplands. As we were approaching the foothills everything seemed fine, too good to be true.

 As we started our climb everything changed instantly. Everything was upside down. Like an earthquake, worse than that, like doomsday! The last report that I got was that the Indian Cavalry Brigade was attacking our trail party. After that other reports came, we sent orders to the units but nothing was rational anymore. What we had imagined as green plains turned out to be hard rocks, rugged terrain, cliffs and sharp rocks. I still get dizzy thinking about those cliffs. It was scary. We were hearing the voices of mules from two hundred meters below and their call was answered by the camels which were a hundred meters above. The camels that fell off the cliff ended up by the creek after falling down while hitting the rocks.  From above they looked like small ants. We descended from those mountains to the Harvan Plains, leaving behind our cannons and ammunition chests. The horses didn’t have horseshoes anymore and the people had no shoes. All the men of the 4^th army were fatigued. They were finished. We thought we could rest once we descended to the flatlands but we didn’t have time to relax.  The Harvan Plains were worse than hell. It was like we didn’t descent to the plains but entered into fire. Since the 7^th and the 8^th Armies were on the left, the entire Lightning Armies Group mixed into one another. Thousands of men, animals, and vehicles were going towards Damascus, falling and tripping. On our right the enemy Cavalry Units were also advancing towards Damascus while keeping an eye on us. On our left there were the gangs of the English Laurence and Emir Faisal, who was a descendant of Prophet. In front of us there were tens of thousands of armed bandits; behind us, there were General Allenby’s fresh agile and content troops. Content because they were victorious and still behind us. General Allenby’s Palestinian Army was forty times stronger in manpower and a thousand times stronger in weapons. The scorching sun and the airplanes were above us. I don’t remember who thought of this first, but they promoted me the Commander of the Infantry Regiment.”

 He massaged his knee on his wounded leg and shook his head desperately. “You know, every officer dreams about being a Commander and thinks about what to do on his first day! I always thought of myself as being in charge of a Regiment that needed further training. I thought about what to say to the privates and what to say to the Officers since my days as a Lieutenant. I had prepared my speech word by word. My motto was ‘iron discipline for duty and real friendship among soldiers’. My Regiment consisted of two hundred men.” He hesitated, “No, actually one hundred and fifty, maybe one hundred and twenty men. They were all resting near the stream. They tried hard to stand up. They didn’t have much of a uniform. Their uniforms were all ripped. They looked worse than the bandits! I was astonished. I think I begged them to sit down. My friends later told me tears rolled down my eyes.” He passed his fist under his eyes. “It was bad. Since that day I cry without realizing. You know sometimes people find this inappropriate. They think us Officers are made out of stone. It is true that we have certain rules for our chosen profession. Maybe it is indeed inappropriate for an Officer to cry; maybe they are right to think this way.”

Jamil was preoccupied; he wanted to ask, “What did you do to get the retreating soldiers back in the trenches?” Then he understood that he was being merciless and stopped talking. Nuri said, “Yes?”

“It is not important.”

“You were going to say something.” The Staff Major Nuri Bey smiled forgivingly, “You were going to ask something related to crying.  Is that right?”

Jamil thought he had to continue with his question, “No, not at all Major; I was wondering if you had to use weapons to get the privates back into the trenches.”

“Yes, I used the weapons.” Major Nuri answered the question without hesitating. “We had to. They panic most of the time; I had that experience a couple of times at Chanakkale.” Then he laughed, “I see now. You thought of me as a weak person, and wondered if I could fire at a person. That’s different. That’s totally different, isn’t it?”

When Jamil laughed as well, Nuri didn’t press the matter any further and continued, “We were retreating but every now and then we showed some teeth like wolves. Soon after I took command, I had to leave the Regiment. I found myself walking along side of a horse drawn carriage holding on to the left side of it on September 25^th, 1918. What happened before then was just like a nightmare that the people with Malaria have between the fevers. We had two to three thousand men. It might have been more. We had to walk during the night since there were air attacks. A Cavalry unit was guarding us with their lances.

“Which division was that?”

“The Third Division! They joined our army before the defeat. They were reserves. One regiment went to join with another unit so there were only two regiments. One of the regiments was leading us and the other was behind us. We were carrying the weight in the middle. Some were too tired to walk and they were falling down. We didn’t have horses anymore. Most of us had to walk. My horse had been shot with a stray bullet. The wounded officers were riding on horses; wounded soldiers were lying on top of each other on the carriages. The artillery soldiers had already left their Battalions by the Jordan River and they were riding the horses, two or three people on each horse. Some Cavalry soldiers had lost their units and they were trying to poke their hungry horses with their lancers to make them walk.”

“How many soldiers did the Cavalry Regiments have?”

“Each had about a hundred and fifty men. We reached Ibrit, which was Aclun’s center, in the morning of September 26th.The Lightning Armies’ Headquarters in Ibrit had the depots full of more than a million kilos of oats, the same amount of wheat and a half a million kilos of legumes. All this would soon be left to the Arab bandits, who were following us at close range. In fact they already had encircled us. Both the men and the animals of the army ate all they could. We took three days of supplies with us and prepared to leave at midnight. However, in the evening a crowd had descended to the town. They were about five hundred people, completely naked. All had their hands in front of them trying to cover themselves; they were robbed by the Arabs. The bandits took everything including the victims’ underwear. There were four hundred privates and seven or eight Officers. Seven Germans were with them. Everyone ran to their aid. The naked people covered themselves with the clothes that they could find. Then we started our journey towards Muzeyrib. Every now and then the people of Harvan were firing bullets at us from all directions. Even today some of us are still mad at Harvan’s people’s hospitability!”

“You are not mad at them?”

“At first I was angry. Then I thought we were mad at them for revolting against the Caliph even though they were Muslims themselves. But then I thought in Europe the same thing was happening. The parties who were at war with one another were all Christians. No one was accusing anyone of fighting against their  Christian brothers. The thing that was unacceptable was that they ripped people’s clothes off under the scorching desert Sun and as if that were not enough, they were firing at an army who is retreating and defeated. When I was a Prisoner of War I learned that the bandits were more than fifteen thousand people. At that time all of 7,8 and 4th Armies’ men were less than that collectively.

On September 27th, our Lancer Regiment approached an Arab village called Tafas.  The villagers opened fire suddenly. The Regiment dismounted and spread like hunters. We retreated and crouched down. In front of our eyes our own men were fighting. None of us had the power to go to their aid.We were warriors only a week ago. We were sitting there like the Harem women who had never held a weapon. The 3rd Cavalry Regiment had 300 members. They were dismounted and ordered to fight in different compositions. First, they wanted to charge ahead. Then they struggled to encircle the village going around us. We were watching all this, completely disconnected to it, as if we were the audience in a movie theater who didn’t like war movies. Then they were behind the thick walls and hills in the village. There was a small flat area in the center and they were responding to the attackers. Even that kind of situation was not enough to awaken us. Only ten people went to their aid amongst us. I think they were the Cavalrymen as well. They couldn’t stay there without helping their comrades. I wanted to talk about that when I started talking to you. Tonight when I couldn’t sleep I thought about Tafas Village and that indifference. You have been complaining about the people’s indifference for so many days now s o I think these things happen. People just freeze unexpectedly. Even though you see others are facing death instead of you, you don’t do anything and you don’t feel ashamed in such a time. How do you awaken people? How do you make them feel something. You can’t get any results by fighting and forcing them.”

Major Nuri changed the position of his wounded leg and he smiled, “Yes, you can’t do anything about it under those conditions. We just sat there and watched. We didn’t even pay attention to the bullets that were flying over our heads and raining down around us. So why  didn’t we move? It wasn’t fear of death!”

Jamil was thinking about something else. He answered absentmindedly. “That’s right!”

“I am sure it wasn’t because of the fear of death. The Division Commander saw that face to face combat was not effective and ordered one unit and a heavy machine gun team to encircle the village by taking an indirect route to approach the village. I was thinking about the same thing as I was sitting down and watching. The bandits retreated to the hills on the right hand side while still fighting. There were only fifty of them left in the town, soon they mounted their horses and camels to flee. We burried the dead. The cavalry rested. I should mention that for the first time in my life I saw a Cavalryman without boots, barefeet on the spur, no socks. The stirups were made out of the copper boilers. Their reins were not made out of leather, but ropes. Most of them had broken spears. Their uniforms were in  bad shape but they had new weapons. They had enough ammunition. Since they were loosing men they had more guns to chose from and more ammunition to use. The Commander left the 6th Regiment in the village so that they could recuperate. They were the ones who had been fired upon first. Now the 8th Regiment was in  front, we were heading North. I was still thinking about the man who was riding with his barefeet on the spur. When I saw him last he was trying to reach the village crawling; his feet were dirty. When he got shot he stretched his legs twice then pulled them to his stomach and stayed motionless. I can still remember his foot prints on the sand.”

 Major Nuri thought for a while and asked, “ Do you know Patrona Halil? After the revolt, when he was taking the new Sultan for the sword ceremony, he rode his horse barefoot. That’s what it says in the history books. You might ask what that has to do with this. As I was thinking this, I heard a commotion and before I could realize what was going on, somebody hit me hard in the head with a heavy object.”

“Who hit you?”

“The people who had been taken out of the village by force. They realized the weaknesses of our Cavalry unit. To plunder our guns, two hundred horsemen together with one hundred men on camels came and attacked the exhausted crowd walking around the carriages. They attacked us with swords. When I opened my eyes I was on a stretcher. My head was aching and there were streaks of light in my eyes. I had a huge bump as big as my fist on the top of my head. I had difficulty moving my right leg. After that day I was never the same. My left eye is still twitching. The cork under my head gear saved my life. Since that day I get depressed, suddenly I can’t breath. I have lost my desire to live. Everything is meaningless. The family, the country, the nation. The threat of foreign army invading our country, friendships, reading writing, everything becomes meaningless! Sometimes women scream ‘I’ve had enough!’  it is just like that. So, that’s how it is. I stay in the same place in the same position for days. I don’t want to move a single muscle. To me saying a single word needs the same amount of effort as running to the summit of Mount Uludag. Forget about talking, it is hard for me even to even listen to someone. I can’t possibly describe to you this sense of fatigue! I even think that I will be thirsty again; I fear being thirsty and not able to find water. I fear remembering what happened to me during the war. That’s the worst fear. I think about this a lot. Why did I leave Rahmi figting and come back? How did I gather the strength? No, It is not an excuse to be wounded. I shouldn’t listen to Rahmi; I should fight with the Sergeant who helped me mount my horse.”

Jamil realized his own fatigue that he sensed in Istanbul was not as deep as Nuri’s. Jamil’s own feelings were not as strong as Nuri’s. Jamil wondered if Colonel Rahmi felt the same thing. Was he desperate? Was that the reason he let himself be killed?”

Nuri continued his story, “I don’t know how I came to Bursa? How I was able to ride the horse and sit straight.  I remembered one thing, that Anzavour wasn’t in the habit of taking the Officers prisoner. I should be ashamed of that thought. If I had ever a slight fear in my subconscious from the past, that meant I wouldnt perform my duties well on that particular day. Yesterday, I wasn’t able to sleep. I felt shame. I was ashamed of myself, as if I was finding fault in someone else. When I was taken prisoner the same thing happened. It was like someone else was taken prisoner and I was feeling ashamed for him. I felt that I didn’t do my best; I didn’t search for all the ways, I stopped fighting too soon. Some of our friends even thought about surrendering to the English and wondered if it would be better than getting caught by the bandits. I didn’t even think about that. A group of us who decided to surrender gathered under a tree at a farm named Eshrefiye. We were like a bunch of sheep keeping close to one another and rubbing their nose against the soil. We saw a Cavalry unit passing by a hundred meters away. They were about thirty-five people. Only twelve of them had spears. They were too proud to surrender. They were determined to continue fighting and try to find a way to pass through. They didn’t look like vicious warriors but they weren’t concerned about the bullets that were coming  their way either. The enemy Battallion was firing bullets over the heads of the surrendered soldiers to the Cavalry Unit. The Cavalry kept on walking towards the homeland without forcing their tired animals. Their commanders were amongst us. I think those Commanders felt worse than us. They must have had more difficulty answering questions at the War Ministry when they returned to Istanbul.”

War Ministry Istanbul

 The Reluctant Warrior 

by Kemal Tahir

Translated by Elif Mat